Update on the family...older kiddo adoption

Last post was August.....okay, that is hard to believe. I can't believe it is 2011 already; I can't really believe what has taken place in our lives over the last 2 years....it is really an amazing few years. It wasn't too many years ago that we responded to the question of adoption pretty emphatically with "no way". So, rather ironic and just plain kind, loving, gracious of God to change up all of that for us.

It has been a bit of a whirlwind since Rediet came home about 5 months ago. She is a wonderful addition to our family; she is a super hard worker and is determined to know English and be the best student and soccer player....motivating her is not a problem. Pulling her back some is. Her english is definitely coming along; understands us pretty well at this point and can communicate decently with us.

I think the most interesting part of the two years....and this is not unexpected, is that it has been hard on our bio kids. They have done wonderfully; they love their brother and sister.....stop and think about that for a little bit...it really is amazing --- they have a new brother and new sister from across the world -- and they love them. But, none of this has come easy and none of it comes without some heartache, some dying to oneself ....which, to ask a 38 or 40 year old to die to oneself is one thing....to ask an 8 year old; well, it can be harder. All four of our kiddos are doing great...but, it is an adjustment on all 4 of them --- and it has been harder than we expected in many ways; easier in others.

We wouldn't change it for anything; thankful to the Lord for this opportunity; He has blessed us with a larger family than we thought we would ever have and we are grateful; grateful that we have 4 children that we know have heard the Gospel and that get a chance to be raised in a very IMPERFECT family....that loves the Lord and has parents that try to love their 4 kiddos in a way that honors the Lord and gives them in our very best moments just a fraction of Gods love for them.....but hopefully enough that it isn't crazy for them to think of their Heavenly Father as a loving Father.

So....not really sure if anyone is still out there......we need to post some pictures, but, part of our own adjustment is realizing with a few more kids, free time is even less so!

If anyone is processing older child adoption; we certainly are a willing respondant of any questions or comments. We've had some friends look into it and I think some of the issues that were raised were surprising to them....and quite honestly, we think if anyone does go into older child adoption, there are many things that you need to at least process mentally....and then expect that you can't fully prepare yourself for it as well. We've also seen how some "information", at least in international adoptions, can be harder to get and with language issues/culture issues, etc --- some information is not accurate (not purposefully....just because of some of those language/culture issues) or not seen as important.

Open to dialogue further on all of this.

Cary

Habesha & Farenji

We have been home now for just about 5 days and its been a good start. We have had the very normal things like just trying to communicate (ie: point, grunt, growl, smile, laugh, gigle and point again). Yes, this is with our 9 year old...in return, we get a few giggles, a few raised eyebrows, a few sighs and the raising of eyebrows, a few "no's", and a few "i'll just ignore whatever it is you maybe just said" looks.

Today was a good one though for Sarah....and I got a neat moment too. For bedtime, Sarah got a hug and a kiss goodnight! For me earlier, we were "talking" --- and I said something to the effect to Rediet that I was habesha (ethiopian).....she laughed, and said, "no, farenji". I responded, "no, habesha"..........this was my fun thing to do in ethiopia.......I don't think I fooled anyone, but, enjoyed telling them I was not farenji, I was habesha. Anyways, I pointed to Sarah and Rediet said, "Farenji". I went and found our amharic book and pointed to her (habesha), me (farenji), and Sarah (farenji)..........and then said in amharic "family". Rediet smiled.

So, if the next 5 days are hard; I'll try and remember tonight.....that was fun. I could imagine...in a really small way, that is most definitely the way the Lord envisioned the way we would interact and care for each other.......habesha and farenji.........one family. black, white, hispanic,.....you name it.........one family; one Father in Heaven; one Son; one Holy Spirit......all in one.........one family. Thankful we get to be a part of His family........how wonderful is He; we are not only "farenji" --- "foreigners" compared to Him.......we don't even deserve to get to look at Him; yet, through His Son, we are one with Him, we are no longer "farenji"......we are family.

I had lunch today with a friend.....and talked about how adoption impacts me probably more than it ever will Rediet or Wolasa.......tonight is a good example.....I was reminded of His goodness through a simple conversation of habesha and farenji.....and reminded of what He has done so that I could be part of His family.....an heir with full rights......just like Rediet and Wolasa are today in my family.

Cary

RedietEthiopia

It's down to one trip

When we got home just about a year ago with our son Wolasa, I did not think we would be back quite so quickly. Having met Rediet on our first trip and then having a chance to see her again on another trip, I thought we could possibly adopt her, but, didn't really think if we did that it would happen so fast. Well, just 6 months into the process the second go round...and here we are....down to one last trip. I filled out the forms to take with us, we've got our plane tickets and now its just waiting till next Friday comes.

This is no doubt not without some anxieties and fears.....fears for each of us involved. We have had good friends go through the older adoptions and it's been really hard. I definitely admit and acknowledge that I'm really hopeful that God will be gracious to all of us in this transition. We certainly feel like He has been with Wolasa. I hope that our girls will all get along; I hope that Wolasa will not feel completely outnumbered and overwhelmed by three sisters; I hope that our kids will really, really understand some day why we have done this.........that they will truly know that our desire to love the Lord and follow Him was reason enough....that they will not only know why but also be thankful. None of that may come soon, but, I do pray that it comes.


So thankful that I have a bride that is a great partner in this....I know she bears most of the load during the days. Thankful that we are on the same page, that we are yoked together to the Lord and that we can remind each other each day to keep Him at the center and to trust in Him. Lord, we trust in You.....thank you for today, thank you for also the day that we bring our daughter home, and thank you for the strength that you'll give us, the peace that I know you provide. Thank you for the many blessings in our lives.

CT

Our newest addition....Rediet Tucker

It has been a crazy week......and it is late after just getting back from Ethiopia. We have passed court and have our 2nd trip planned for Aug 13 to Aug 20 to go pick up Rediet. We had a great time with her this last week, all three of our girls. An amazing trip and so thankful that Rediet is now officially our daughter.

Cary and Sarah......exhausted from 30+ hours of travel and very little sleep.

Addis ----- Here we come! Oh yeah....in 7 days!

Well......I truly believe God is in control...sometimes things happen that re-affirm that; sometimes things happen that cause me to trust in Him and trust in the things that I cannot see....but that I hope in and believe.

Yesterday and today were a couple of days where we got to see the part of His control....and boy is it sweet.

We are heading to Addis for our court date for our "R"....we can't wait to see you honey. We have MOWA and our Court date on July 27.

Prayers for a success on both ends and hopefully by end of August, she will be back with us.

So amazing...didn't expect till after rainy season ---- so excited, so much to do. Just bought 4 tickets.....ouch! Can't wait for our daughters to meet "R" and for them to see Ethiopia and hang out with our good friend Solomon while we are there.

Also hope to see Aschalew (director of Kidmia, www.kidmia.org) while we are there.

Praise the Lord. I know He is GREAT without a court date.....but, HE is GREAT with the court date...

Cary

I71H Approval

We received our immigration approval today! So, what that means for us is that we get one more document notarized tomorrow....and I think the paperwork is done for quite some time. More importantly though....what that really means is that we get to get started of having our documents sent to Ethiopia and getting a court date scheduled. It would be a miracle to beat the rainy season....so, our expectations are for October timeframe...but it would be wonderful to go early. We can't wait to let our sweet girl know about her family and the to start sending pics and stuff....but, that all will have to wait till the process moves along further.

We have also been really encouraged by the process that Gladney has been walking us through. They recently launched a program called Pathways, a program designed to help families in the adoption of older children. We've been meeting quite a bit with our case worker, Amy, and really walking through a ton of issues. So thankful that the Lord has provided this resource for us and that we are surrounded by so many people from Gladney and our church body, Watermark, that has a heart for the orphaned and vulnerable children. (www.gladney.org)

Lastly, there has been a ton going on with Kidmia these days. Our new in country direction, Ato Aschalew, has been amazing. The Lord was very gracious in providing someone like Aschalew to lead Kidmia. We are now caring for over 50 kids (25 on site and 25 off site in the community). We also have a friend going over in the next week and will be capturing photos and video for us....can't wait to update everyone. (www.kidmia.org)