Thinking about the process

We have been laying around today - resting from our spring break trip to San Antonio - and have had lots of time to think about the adoption process. Actually a bit nervous excited today ---starting to think that at some point in next month or so we should get Gladney approved and then start to hear back from FBI sometime in next month or so. Just praying for our daughter - and praying for the process. I so hope that we get on the wait list before some of our friends go back for their adoptions - it would be great to have some friends put their arms around her and tell her how much she is loved.

We also are experiencing Wolasa's first sickness since being home for over 6 months (that is amazing in itself). He has been a trooper - laying around all day today - no complaining though.

Blessing

Blessing- a gift bestowed by God. Just had to write that today as i think about my daughter across the world right now. I am in awe of what the Lord continues to teach me and also how I desire to grow. I have been deeply challenged by our church over the past few weeks. The message series, Life is too short.. so convicting! www.watermark.org go to messages and you can download or just watch. I have also but studying the book of Daniel through a bible study by Mrs. Beth Moore. She is a hoot!but I believe very passionate and delivers the truth well. It's about modern day Babylon. Which could mean a place yet more a philosophy, a mentality too. Am I influencing this modern day Babylon or am I allowing it to influence me? But as I've thought about my daughter, I am overwhelmed with a desire to get her home. I can't believe my heart has turned, once again, and have the peace to move forward with this sweet child of God. Will it be the most challenging thing Iwill ever go through?Idon't know... maybe, maybe not..BUT I know God will get me through. I've enjoyed the reminders throughout this study about trials and how we can approach them. Beth states, typically 3 scenarios when we face trials...(like shadrach,Meshach and Abednego when they stood firm in faith and approached the furnace) WE can be delivered from the fire, and our faith is built..We can be delivered through the fire and our faith is refined..we can be delivered by the fire into His arms and our faith is perfected. WOW.. These guys were delivered through the fire (not from it!) They stood firm and didn't allow fear to overcome them ..They worshiped God alone, not the idols, not the king, not fear! For me my biggest idols is fear, focusing on my circumstance and being persuaded by temporal instead of eternal, focusing on others behaivor and allowing that to consume me instead of God and HIS word.. Daniel 3:17-18... If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." I know I'm babbling..My point is that I know the calling the Lord has put on my life.. To serve and worship HIM and out of that should be an overflow of abundant joy and love for others! inspite of all of us being challenging and difficult :) I am blessed, and my daughter is a blessing! I know it will be hard, yet I also know that God is good, and this child, who did not choose her sufferings, will be brought to us by the Lord to love and to share about a GOD who is merciful and will never leave you or forsake you. You are a blessing sweet girl. Love, mom

SNow in Texas!

Gotta love snow in Texas, everyone freaks out! It's beatiful to enjoy for a small amount of time..and that's why I love it here! So Wolasa loved the snow, loved building a snowman, loved it! all the way up until the time the snow ball fights started. When Carly had her chance (wondering what was going through her mind) she threw a Nolan Ryan right at Wolasa and it was all over.. The crying began for the next half hour.. Poor baby..I got to love on him good. so then I am outside again and some friends of ours pull up in their car to say hello. As they roll down the back window and as I see the clear shot to the four year boy in the back I'm already turning to look at my oldest Caitlin(the rest in slow motion). Caitlin! "noooooooooooooo" But yes, her mind had already decided to move forward. Who knew that she would aim precisely and her target would be hit right between the eyes. Soooo sorry sweet friends,thanks for laughing and not judging. Your son wasn't laughing, in fact the opposite. Another memory to add to the crazy life of the Tucker's! God is so good, thank you for these unpredictable children who keep me on my knees and teach me that I cannot predict or control anything! Faith refined a little more today.

Ease and Comfort

As we process adoption, one of the things that is interesting is how often people are concerned about what the results may be. Most of the time, well meaning and good people who care about us, are concerned with how hard adoption might be. They are right in many ways - adoption can be hard.....but, so are many other decisions that we make in life as well. Marriage is probably the one closest to adoption since both are truly "forever" commitments and can have generational impact.

The interesting thing is most people don't tell you not to marry because it is hard. But, with adoption, "hard" or in my words...."lack of ease or comfort in your life" is often brought up.

Why?

The other thing that as we process adoption, "God's will" often comes us. Why is God's will associated with whether or not something is "easy" or "comfortable". My guess is because we have people who preach that your life will be easy if you pray and say you love Jesus. Of course...this is no where in the Bible.

Just a ramble here - if something is God's will is not determined by how easy or comfortable the decision in which we made makes our life. It is God's will in our lives if it is something that God affirms in scripture. The fact that the results are hard does not mean it isn't God's will (just because it is easy doesn't mean it is God's will either).

I guess I'll I'm trying to do at this point is to ask the question - will this decision honor and glorify Christ. If the answer is "YES" - than as far as I'm concerned right now.....it is a good decision. Hope the results are good.....if not - than He must need to teach me something. Most likely, it will be something about my ideas on ease and comfort.


would love comments or challenges on this.
Cary

Sarah's Birthday

Since I really don't use Facebook....don't have a Twitter account, and don't have an Iphone....I thought I would post a quick note on my night tonight.

I took my absolutely beautiful bride out for her 36th birthday dinner celebration. We went to The Keg in Plano and enjoyed a great steak and were served by a really nice Ethiopian young man named Dawit.

My honest thoughts tonight as I sat with Sarah - wow.....she really is more beautiful today than she was when we first met when she was just 23 (....Sarah - I thought you were beautiful then too!). Sarah....I love you honey. I am so blessed to have you as my bride, my partner in life. I am so blessed that God was just so amazingly kind and gentle with me to give me a wife that would not only do the "till death do us part" thing....but, He was gracious enough to bring me to Him through your acts of kindness, forgiveness, grace and love.

Sarah - you are a beautiful person. You have a beautiful heart. You are a beautiful mother. You have given me beautiful children. You have beautiful eyes...beautiful cheek bones.....a beautiful smile......I love you so. You are a most gorgeous 36 today my beautiful bride.

I love you.

Your husband who is humbly seeking Christ....praying that I will not screw up and think I can do this on my own.....praying that I will always seek Him first and as I do that - praying that I am the husband that you deserve.

Cary

Tucker Christmas! Wisconsin bound!

Here it is!

Wolasa's first Christmas!

We drove across the country to be with Cary's family for Christmas! It was so much fun and so very special! I have been meaning to show video so share our journey and just how sweet it has been with Wolasa! so Stayed tuned for that! IT's coming when I can remember how!