As we process adoption, one of the things that is interesting is how often people are concerned about what the results may be. Most of the time, well meaning and good people who care about us, are concerned with how hard adoption might be. They are right in many ways - adoption can be hard.....but, so are many other decisions that we make in life as well. Marriage is probably the one closest to adoption since both are truly "forever" commitments and can have generational impact.
The interesting thing is most people don't tell you not to marry because it is hard. But, with adoption, "hard" or in my words...."lack of ease or comfort in your life" is often brought up.
Why?
The other thing that as we process adoption, "God's will" often comes us. Why is God's will associated with whether or not something is "easy" or "comfortable". My guess is because we have people who preach that your life will be easy if you pray and say you love Jesus. Of course...this is no where in the Bible.
Just a ramble here - if something is God's will is not determined by how easy or comfortable the decision in which we made makes our life. It is God's will in our lives if it is something that God affirms in scripture. The fact that the results are hard does not mean it isn't God's will (just because it is easy doesn't mean it is God's will either).
I guess I'll I'm trying to do at this point is to ask the question - will this decision honor and glorify Christ. If the answer is "YES" - than as far as I'm concerned right now.....it is a good decision. Hope the results are good.....if not - than He must need to teach me something. Most likely, it will be something about my ideas on ease and comfort.
would love comments or challenges on this.
Cary
Sunday, February 7, 2010
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5 comments:
I LOVE this. It is so very true. I find that many times it during challenging times that I grow the greatest. I don't think Paul, Stephen, or especially JESUS said that it has to be easy to do God's will. Often it can be very difficult. It doesn't mean AT ALL that it will be difficult, but that "easy" or "hard" is not a way to determine God's will. When he commands us to be WILLING to give up everything, I don't think anyone would automatically assume that was easy to do if it comes to that.
When it comes to adoption, finances are not easy. Getting paperwork ready is not easy. Often flying across the world leaving our other children in the care of others is not easy. I've found the easiest part is loving my kids. That doesn't mean patience is even always easy.
God's will ROCKS and will stretch us and grow us in so many way...easy? No...Awesome? Yes!
Thank you so much for writing this...sorry for writing a book :)!
Oops...forgive my spelling bloopers...
Cary, thanks for processing where we can see insights you have gleamed. I thought that your point that "people don't tell you not to get married just because it is hard." When you mention the second point, being God's will, are people putting the two together or saying outright that it's not God's will for you guys? I was a little confused on that and found it interesting.
Totally agree Cary. Folks generally look at whether something is easy or hard and then use that as a determination of whether something is God's will. People will kindly tell me that Beck and Deshi are happy, so it is obviously God's will. Of course, that is heretical.
As Americans we do that all the time. For instance, a lot of people will say God wants them to switch jobs and use as their strongest proof the fact that they are not finding joy in their job.
I heard Chan speak this weekend about how Scripture calls the Holy Spirit the Comforter. He then said most American's are more concerned about being comfortable than being with the Comforter.
As we think about what is next for us (5 yr old? 11 yr old? foster system?), I constantly remind myself the goal is to glorify and please God, not be safe and comfortable.
Glad Christ did not choose comfort (note: He asked God to remove the cup...but only if it was the Father's will). Glad Paul didn't. Glad John the Baptist didn't. Glad Stephen didn't. Glad Peter didn't.
Aleks....good question. We don't have people come out and tell us that adopting is Not God's will. We do have a lot of people that look at our situation (kind of to Beau's comments) and say - wow, things are great with Wolasa -so, that really confirmed that God wanted you to do this. Or, we will hear things to the degree of, "you really need to process this further and understand if it is God's will because it is going to be so hard". My point is just that hard or easy shouldn't determine if it is God's will. I believe it IS God's will because He tells us to care for widows and orphans....that's it.
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